Because I Can! A week's worth of Socks.

Where Is My Mother And Is She knitting?

Hey Ya'll! One month since I had Marcella....I'm madly in love with her. However, with each passing day, she's getting more assertive and ill-at-ease. She hates being messed with and seems a bit on the cranky side. I am nursing her but my milk supply has been low and I've had to supplement her feeding with that crap Similac. This soy Similac is essentially half corn syrup, then balanced with sugar, coconut oil, corn oil and soy. Crap. But my boobs are only producing about an ounce each every 6 hours. Not enough.

As for knitting? As soon as I start knitting, she starts screaming. It's uncanny, really.

She's Here.

Bump Watch

I Love My President.

Mammalian Relief

I strode into the office with my heart in my throat. I gently explained to the nurse that if I received any bad news, I would break down and collapse onto the floor. I was on the edge.

"Lie to me. Lie to me. Lie to me!!!"

The Dr. came in and examined me.

"Yes, I see the discoloration, the skin texture...I don't think it is anything you need to worry about."

"How long do I have, Doc? Days? Weeks? Hours?", I sobbed.

"Ah, you are fine. Don't worry."

"Biopsy? Punch biopsy? Needle aspiration?", I screeched. Hands wringing, teeth gnashing...

"Ah, No. No need. You'll be fine. I have diagnosed 6 people with this disease since Christmas. You don't have it. Trust me."

Looking at him sideways, I finally conceded that maybe he was right and I would live thru this after all. He then proceeded to spend 20 minutes reading me text messages from his daughter, who is a comedian/hypochondriac in California. He also said that I should consider stand-up, that I would be very effective on stage.

This Picture Makes Me Happy

After a day of sobbing and showing customers my boobs ...I met with my therapist and she had a few tidbits for me.

1. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder. Duh.
2. My parents told me how special I was all the time growing up and now, I'm so special, I can get an extremely rare cancer. (??)
3. I need to stay off the internet and stop reading medical info.
4. Despite all the medical knowledge I do know, I am not a breast specialist, a surgeon, or an Obgyn. I did not go to medical school.
5. Everyday is a blessing. Treat it like one.
6. Get on Lexapro as soon as I'm not pregnant anymore. It will tone down the obsessive thoughts.
7. I should be a stand-up comedian. She really believes I have the chops. And she is a smart woman.

I feel better now and think I can calmly wait until my biopsy on Wednesday. I'll try not to keep showing people my boobs.